K-Fed used to be cool. The clothes. The girl. The mad skillz.
Now's he's shaven, making money, and rallying for justice. What am I supposed to think? Was Britney right all along? Is he really the raptastic dancing dream boy she so covets? These are important questions. But first and foremost, we come to this:
This is the man who seems to care for K-Fed jr. I'm not sure what I find more disturbing--that Britney can't roll her baby's carriage herself or that K-Fed has a stand-in dad.
Of course, if they had a youthful French Au Pair it might not seem like a big deal. But in light of Kevin's habit of impregnating women and then disappearing to rap and/or dance, I won't beat myself up over it.
Perhaps the greater question is, why do I care?
Well I'll tell you why. Because it matters.
You know what else matters? Israel. Lebanon too. Blame for the burgeoning war aside, I find it quite disturbing that Israel has instituted a policy of bombing any and every vehicle fleeing the country. According to the Washington Post this morning, residents of southern Lebanon received the following recorded message:
"Leave now, beyond the Litani River that bisects the rock-studded wadis of the south. Don't flee on motorcycles or in vans or trucks. Otherwise, you will be a target."
Love, Israel.
Is that not the most bizarre thing ever? Set aside the fact that they're obviously targeting anyone and everyone along the border...why are they providing these people with Tolkien-esc directions? You musttravel past the mountains of Hithaeglir, young one, for only then will you reach Lothlórien. But beware, for the way is perilous!
Why not just dispatch some dungeon masters to various Lebanese locals to guide the local populations to safety? That's what I'd do. Skinny nerds with thick glasses would emerge from desert, raise their 8-sided die high in the air and say, "Follow me, if you dare."
When I was a boy, I had night terrors. I'd jump out of bed and run up and down the hallways in my house. I'd bash my head against the refridgerator. One time I took a swing at my sister. I stopped having them sometime around adolescence. But every once in a while, I get nostalgic.
Last night at about 3:30am I woke up Mandie and said, "I could just watch these vegetables grow all day."
Mandie answered by saying, "What?!"
Then I said, "Onions" and fell back asleep.
Sometime early in our relationship, I woke Mandie up in the middle of the night and said, "I'd jump off a cliff for you."
Mandie responded by saying, "What?!"
Then I said, "Oranges" and fell back asleep.
No joke. I'm not sure what's wrong with me. I can only guess that I'm destined to be a farmer specializing in onion fields and orange orchards. Quite a future. Thankfully, Mandie still talks to me.
Yesterday I braved the heat and rode my bike up to the garden after work.
My girlfriend and I maintain a garden in a stranger's backyard on Warder Street. He's not exactly a stranger, we've met him once or twice, but otherwise he's a total stranger Mandie found on freecycle. He gets off on other people gardening in his backyard. That works for us. We get to keep everything we grow. So far we've got beets, corn, tomatoes, onions, carrots and lots lots more.
Anyway, I rode my bike up to the garden after work to pick ripe tomatoes. It really isn't that far from work (downtown k street to warder & irving) but in the heat and humidity it's a bit nasty. So I didn't stay long and soon found myself riding back home up Columbia. Somewhere around 11th I came across maybe four or five cop cars and about 9 officers standing around what appeared to be a fender bender.
I often see cops standing around in groups. I'm not sure what the deal is. If somebody is getting a ticket on 14th, three minutes later 3 cop cars will show up. They'll have a party and stand around. If a cop illegally parks his car on 18th while he goes to buy a soda, two other squad cars will pull up behind him so they can all discuss the merits of said carbonated beverage. They talk. They stare into space. They fold their arms and grimace.
It's something really bizarre.
This is what I encountered yesterday while driving home. Two cars were parked askew in the middle of the road. Two "civilians" sat in one car, one of them casually sipped on a soda. The other car was empty. AT LEAST nine uniformed officers stood around the scene. They weren't taking down information, or cuffing anyone. They weren't interviewing witnesses or picking up body parts. They were just, you know, hanging out. I should have taken a photo.
Mind you, Washington D.C. is currently experiencing a "Crime Emergency". 14 murders since July 1st, or should I say, one rich white guy murdered in Georgetown since July 1st. I don't mean to be callous, it's a tragedy, but they never would have declared a "Crime Emergency" if it weren't for that particular case. Regardless, there are murders taking place in D.C. at a ridiculous rate and for some reason it seems prudent for 9 police officers to casually stand around what appeared to be a traffic accident.
Now MAYBE they were involved in some sort of "drive by shooting". Maybe, as mom mom would say, these civilians were on their way to a "drug-party". I can't be sure. What I do know is that nobody seemed to be to concerned or stressed out. Oh, well the guys in the car were young black men. Maybe that's cause for concern (please note the non-verbal sarcasm).
To wrap this up, I got home and took a shower, and forgot all about this until right now. In the future, I plan to take a photograph of every time I see an inordinate number of uniformed officers standing around for no particular reason. Please join me in this effort and send me what you get!
