K-Fed. And Israel.

K-Fed used to be cool. The clothes. The girl. The mad skillz.

Now's he's shaven, making money, and rallying for justice. What am I supposed to think? Was Britney right all along? Is he really the raptastic dancing dream boy she so covets? These are important questions. But first and foremost, we come to this:



This is the man who seems to care for K-Fed jr. I'm not sure what I find more disturbing--that Britney can't roll her baby's carriage herself or that K-Fed has a stand-in dad.

Of course, if they had a youthful French Au Pair it might not seem like a big deal. But in light of Kevin's habit of impregnating women and then disappearing to rap and/or dance, I won't beat myself up over it.

Perhaps the greater question is, why do I care?

Well I'll tell you why. Because it matters.

You know what else matters? Israel. Lebanon too. Blame for the burgeoning war aside, I find it quite disturbing that Israel has instituted a policy of bombing any and every vehicle fleeing the country. According to the Washington Post this morning, residents of southern Lebanon received the following recorded message:

"Leave now, beyond the Litani River that bisects the rock-studded wadis of the south. Don't flee on motorcycles or in vans or trucks. Otherwise, you will be a target."

Love, Israel.

Is that not the most bizarre thing ever? Set aside the fact that they're obviously targeting anyone and everyone along the border...why are they providing these people with Tolkien-esc directions? You must travel past the mountains of Hithaeglir, young one, for only then will you reach Lothlórien. But beware, for the way is perilous!

Why not just dispatch some dungeon masters to various Lebanese locals to guide the local populations to safety? That's what I'd do. Skinny nerds with thick glasses would emerge from desert, raise their 8-sided die high in the air and say, "Follow me, if you dare."

That's what I'd do. Also, I wouldn't bomb people.