The City Stole My Car!

You wake up on a Saturday morning and want nothing more than to spend the day tending vegetables in the fresh air. But what happens when you go outside and find your car missing? Do you call the police and report it stolen? More often then not you end up calling the police, but not because it was stolen. You see, the DC Department of Public Works is steadfast in its commitment to keeping city streets clean. Just check out the average street in Columbia Heights, Shaw or Brookland. Those syringes, condoms and broken bottles of Mad Dog 20/20? Well, yeah, they litter the street. But the DC Department of Public Works is HOT ON THE CASE! That’s why you can’t park your car on the street on any number of days. Just read the signs! Street Cleaning! Monday and Thursday! Tuesday and Friday! Monday through Sunday (if you’re in Georgetown)!

On Monday, Mandie parked her car on the Tuesday side of the street. Then she forgot to move it. She got a ticket for 30 dollars. When she logged online to pay off the ticket, there was no mention of her car having been towed. But when we walked over to where she parked the car on 15^th Street, surprise surprise…no car! Before panicking, Mandie called up the DC Police non-emergency number to find out if they towed her car. The first charming police officer she spoke to said they "moved" her car to the 2300 block of 16th street. Mandie understandably seemed puzzled by this, as 16th street is a main commuter route. If they had towed her car on a Tuesday, it couldn't possibly still be there. But yes, it was there! The officer insisted!

So, we walked down the block in the sweltering DC heat. Of course, no car. Mandie called back. She spoke to another officer, for an even longer period of time. They said her car was on the 2300 block of 16th. Mandie tried to explain that if they HAD moved her car there on Tuesday, it would have HAD to have been towed again, as they tow cars off of 16th street every day at 7:30am and 4:30 pm before rush hour. But no, the officer insisted that they only "moved" her car once. If it's not there, it must have been stolen. And no, they couldn't file a stolen vehicle report over the phone. We would have to walk over to the precinct station on V Street.

This didn't make sense. No one would steal a car equipped with THE CLUB off of 16th street between 7:30 and 4:30 on a weekday. Only an idiot would attempt such a thing. Why not walk a block over where there aren't three dozen witnesses driving by every minute?

We walked home. We needed to regroup. After some thought, Mandie called up the DC Department of Towing and Impoundment. She spoke to Sara, our new personal hero. Sara said our car was moved to the 2300 block of 16th. Mandie explained that it wasn't there. Sara put Mandie on hold for a minute, then came back and explained her car was on Belmont Street. Mandie asked why the Police told her otherwise. Sara laughed and said they probably hadn't even bothered to check if the car had been towed again. It seems this is a common problem.

To sum this up, the DC Police Department would rather have its citizens file stolen vehicle reports than actually check their towing records. Still surprised they can't solve murders?

Best yet, when we eventually found the car, it had two parking tickets on it, including a $100 dollar ticket because they had to tow our car after towing it into an illegal zone.

I love DC!